Be A Builder Not A Destroyer
A reflection about my grandfather on the anniversary of D-Day
A quick note: As many of you know I am in the middle of a career transition. For about the next two weeks I need to really buckle down and focus on some projects that will help me solidify that goal. That means I won’t be publishing any newsletters until about July. Because of that I’m suspending subscriptions so that no one is charged. But before that happens I wanted to leave you with this personal reflection about my grandfather in honor of the anniversary of D-Day.
With the anniversary of D-Day and the current “burn it all down” political environment I’ve found myself thinking a lot about my grandfather.
My grandfather, John Cole, was a sharp shooter in the Army. He fought in D-Day. I believe he as in the second wave that landed on Omaha beach, but I’m not exactly sure.
He fought in the Battle of the Bugle where, after being shot in the leg, he carried a fellow wounded soldier back to base. I don’t know if that solider lived or died, but I know this earned my grandfather a purple heart.
He also fought house-to-house in the liberation of Paris, earning him a bronze star for valor.
And yet none of this mattered that much to my grandfather.
While I’m sure he was proud of his bravery and glad he could help people suffering from oppression, he never really talked about these feats of courage. In fact, the first time my family heard anything like the full story of his life during WWII was when he narrated it to me for an 8th grade writing project – though I should add I didn’t learn about his bronze star until college!
But growing up I knew a lot about my grandfather.
I knew he built the first soccer goals for the city of Sioux Falls (the ones with the bar down the middle).
I knew he helped found the first local technical college when he came up with a plan to help high school dropouts get trained as welders.
I knew he was on the board, and eventually the board chair, of McCrossan’s Boy’s Ranch, which provides an alternative to juvenile detention for certain kinds of juvenile offenders.
I knew he helped found, through his local Rotary chapter, an organization that matched people with various disabilities to appropriate manufacturing jobs so that they could earn money and grow in dignity. (Eventually, for all his years of service, a Rotary scholarship with setup in his honor.)
I knew he would sometimes tutor his employees in math so they could get their GED’s, and that he would then use his connections through Rotary, the Masons, and the Shriners (he was a member of all them) to get them better jobs.
I knew he (and my grandmother) personally and through their business donated money to the symphony, the homeless shelters, the museums, the fairs, the rodeos, and other art and culture events of our area.
I could go on and on, but here’s why I believe this is important today: After hearing him narrate his life during World War II I asked him why he didn’t talk about it more? Really I was asking, Why is this – so excited to a 13 year-old boy – something I don’t know about you?
His answer: “It’s not that important in the grand scheme of things.”
After years of thinking about that answer here is what I believe my grandfather meant – it’s certainly what he lived: What you tear down isn’t as important as what you build.
My grandfather spent his life building the kind of world he wanted to live in and pass on to his children and grandchildren. Which is why he didn’t care if he was remembered for his works of heroism on the battlefield because he wanted to remembered for his works of compassion and community building. This is what filled him with pride.
This member of the Greatest Generation didn’t want to burn it all down. He wanted to build it all up. He knew that teamwork, compassion, and generosity are more powerful than bombs and bullets because the legacy they leave is one of faith, hope, and love – the greatest of things that last forever.
That’s why, as important as remembering D-Day is (and it is!), what people like my grandfather thought was more important to remember was this: Be a builder not a destroyer. At a time when “burn it all down” appears to be the easy path, may we find the courage to be builders. As my grandfather told me, “Get involved. Help people. And you’ll never work a day in your life.”